Fear

Fear

Fear is a physical and emotional uneasiness felt about something known or unknown, over which you perceive you have control.

Are you Afraid? Or Anxious? Click to find out 

Are you just afraid? Or do you have a phobia? Click  to find out

The key word here is PERCEIVED. Fear entails an inflation of the negative qualities of the object you fear and an inflation of what those negative qualities could do to ME. This results in a preoccupation with what you fear and a further inflation of what harm it could to ME, and this vicious circle can lead to a state of anxiety and ultimately to panic.   For example, you are planning your first house. You have found a most conveniently placed piece of land and a beautiful house, which is placed rather inconveniently. Faced with the decision of which to purchase, you become unsure and indecisive, which lead you to fear the financial commitment�you are now afraid that you may not be financially ready to purchase a home. What began as a small decision between a plot, or house has lead to a fear of financial instability.

Like so many emotions, fear has both positive and negative aspects.

  • Positively, fear acts as a signal. Genuine fear warns and reminds us to “Stay alert!” Fear signals us to pay attention. At its best, fear can catapult us into action.

  • Negatively, genuine fear does in fact threaten and jeopardize us on all levels of our lives. It can become generalized so that you have an overriding feeling of fear with no real focus.

     

 

CAUSES OF FEAR:

Fear is a primitive and deeply rooted emotion. It is easy to battle that which you are aware of, but how do you fight that which you never recognize? Fear is always accompanied by unawareness (ignorance, confusion) of some fact of reality – either not knowing it or knowing it in a manner that contradicts reality. Let us consider six possible variations.

1. Unawareness of cause and effect and how things exist. This could result from

a. an inflated sense of self and the belief that should be able to control everything (eg. should be able to prevent my child from getting hurt). Thus, when the unexpected event occurs (child getting hurt) the sense of control is shattered and a feeling of personal inadequacy sets in leading to a fear of the unexpected. Or,

Unawareness of a personal inadequacy resulting in an inability to control an object or event with a consequent fear of the object or event.

Unawareness of the impermanence of situations e.g. fear of an inability to handle your emotions on the loss of a loved one, due to a lack of awareness that your experiences of pain and sadness are impermanent and will pass, like the pain of a dentist pulling teeth.

Unawareness of your own ability with a consequent dependence on others due to

a. an image of “me” as incompetent, inadequate, not good enough, and who can never learn,

b. an image of “someone else” as better than “me”and who can save “me”.

Unawareness of the conventional nature of someone or of the Human Mind. For instance, fear of authority figures arising out of an unawareness that their behaviour arises from the conventional nature of their position, that, they too, are human beings, with feelings just as you have and that they have lives outside the office, which affect their moods.

Unawareness of the sentient nature of other beings e.g. that snakes and insects have their own nature and would not harm us unless they feel threatened by us.

Unawareness of the imperfectness of your conventional nature e.g. fear of failure resulting from the lack of awareness that you can only do the best that you can and await the result.

Unawareness of your own “unconscious” (i.e. buried) thoughts and emotions. Because the unconscious is the unknown, and you fear the unknown, you end up being afraid of your unknown unconscious qualities. Thus, you may identify with your conscious intellectual side and ignore or deny your unknown, unconscious, emotional feeling side. You may project the emotional feeling side as a shadow and be frightened of others who are very emotional. You may be afraid of your own emotional side and have anxiety about being out of touch with your feelings. If you identify with your conscious emotional feeling side and deny your unconscious intellectual side, you may project the intellectual side as a shadow and be intimidated by those who are intellectual. You may be afraid to try to understand anything and feel anxiety about being intellectually dull.

For tips on how to manage your fear click here

 

KINDS OF FEAR:

Fear comes in many different shapes and sizes, but the most common can be categorized as follows.

The Fear of Lack of Money: The fear of lack of money is not only a common fear, but also one of the most destructive. This fear paralyses the faculty of reason, destroys the faculty of imagination, kills off self-reliance, undermines enthusiasm, discourages initiative, leads to uncertainty of purpose, encourages procrastination, wipes out enthusiasm and makes self-control an impossibility

The Fear of Criticism: Nobody likes being criticized, but for some, the fear of criticism is a serious obstacle to achievement in aspects of life. This potent fear can manifest through self-consciousness, feelings of inferiority, extravagance and lack of initiative, poise and ambition. It can be embedded in your mind from many sources.

The Fear of Ill Health: This is closely associated with the fear of old age and the fear of death. Many people fear sickness because they worry about dying. It is estimated that 75% of people who visit doctors suffer from hypochondria.

 

The Fear of loss: This is the most painful of all fears and often plays havoc on the mind You fear loss in three main areas.

  • Loss of “Image.” Teenagers so fear humiliation that they can succumb to peer pressure and act inappropriately, even dangerously.

  • Loss of Friendships. Children with this fear avoid taking interpersonal risks, such as stating strong opinions that diverge from the group or family, or making decisions on their own.

  • Loss of love. This fear usually comes up when you feel betrayed by a loved one in experiencing or sharing their real feelings, leading to jealousy, finding fault, belief that love can be bought etc. This leaves us open to feeling lonely.

The Fear of old age: The fear of old age results from a fear of lack of money and fear of the unknown world beyond. Diminishing attraction is also a part of this fear. The fear of old age shows symptoms when one develops an inferiority complex around the age of 40. You may also begin referring to yourself as OLD.

The Fear of Death: The fear of death is widespread. Most of us know someone who fears death, or maybe you fear death. People who fear death often think of dying rather than making the most out of life. Fear of leaving loved ones poverty-stricken, fear of ill health, insanity and religious fanaticism also accompany this fear.

Fear of Separation and/or Loneliness: This is the most basic fear and it includes fear of death. Our culture teaches us to fear being alone. When you face being alone, your fear of loneliness recedes. Then you are left with the more basic fear, which is a fear of separation. This fear of separation is the basic fear, which underlies your other fears.

Fear of the Unknown: This fear accompanies change, growth and any new endeavor, such as going to a new school or making a new friend.

Fear of Pain: Physical, mental, emotional or spiritual pain can be imagined or experienced and then feared. Fear of experiencing the pain keeps adults and children unnecessarily locked into such situations.

Fear is out of proportion to of the reality of the threat and which leads to avoidance of the feared object or event is known as a Phobia